Yngwie Johann Malmsteen (born Lars Johan Yngve Lannerb
What happens when you put a bunch of bloodthirsty, music-loving goblins together? Well, a lot of disembowelment, but also a lot of catchy tunes. Formed six millennia ago, and practicing only every other leap year on a full moon, the band has perfected their brand of crushing goblin metal. On a cold, dreary winter night in July of 2006, Nicholas Von Doom and Tim were in the woods engaging in general tomfoolery when they stumbled upon a mysterious cardboard box with their names crudely inscribed with a Sharpie® Permanent Marker.